Amir wasn't thinking properly. He'd been under a lot of stress lately. He had an idea forming in his head and he had made up his mind to follow it through but first he had some loose ends to tie up.
What he was going to do was risky, possibly foolish, impulsive, and entirely the sort of thing he was prone to. He was aware that the chances he might not return were great. But deep down in the part of his mind that still belonged exclusively to him, the part that was growing smaller year by year, he recognized that the benefits outweighed the risks.
Bao's successes with Pakpao and Amir's own growing consciousness of the fact that Subira was using him had made him question his stance on numerous things, particularly now that he had located and met Kiamhaat. He hadn't expected Aishe to have caught on to the fact that he'd been around their house. She must have some sort of helpful ability in that area.
Instead of facing her Amir did something completely out of character and lost his nerve. He turned and ran, but Aishe followed. He was quick and agile as a jackal, but his top speed was still about the same as any vampire, and he couldn't ditch her. Finally, down on the beach, he gave in and stopped, shifting back to his normal form and staring at her.
Of course she recognized him. Why not? This idea was quickly going south. He quickly affixed his silken smile to his face and nodded at Aishe.
"Long time no see," he said. "How's the skeeball competition?"
Positive ID (Private: Amir)
Aishe was out behind the house she shared with Kiamhaat, not far from the ocean; in fact, it was entirely possible for them to walk to the beach when they chose. There was a strip of woodland immediately behind the house though, and this was where many of her raccoon friends lived. Lately, they had been nervous. They told her there had been an animal present. A hunter. She was certain from their impressions that the animal had not been hunting them, but the raccoons made excellent spies and given the trouble at Reign's in the past few months Aishe had had them stay on the lookout for any four legged invaders.
They had seen the wolf, if that's what it was, recently. Very recently. Aishe looked around. She didn't see anything or hear anything unusual. She felt it though. Something, or someone, was watching her.
She turned, on a hunch, and saw it there as if it had just emerged from behind a tree. A smallish canine. Large ears, delicate bone structure. A coyote or something?
"You."
She took a step toward it.
"Have you been looking for me?"
The canine lowered its head. It took a step forward.
"I don't understand."
Aishe stepped toward it, not sure why she was talking to it. She had the impression, though, that it understood her. For one, she had never had her empathy work on an animal before. But she clearly saw this canine. Saw him like she saw people. He was a kaleidoscope of colors. Muddy red, bright yellow, dark green, and black all warred around him. Colors Aishe had never associated with anyone, really. There were more positive ones underneath but they were buried under anger, resentment, unforgiveness.
"Who are you? What do you need?"
In response the canine turned and darted away.
"No, come back!"
Aishe chased it. Heedless of the cool wind on her face and in her nose, ignorant of the branches that whipped against her face she chased. She raised her arms, shoving twigs and leaves out of the way. The canine ran ahead of her but it didn't seem too much faster than she. Her boots cracked against the fallen leaves and dead branches on the ground.
Gradually the forest gave way to sand as she followed the flashing multi-colored coat of the shapeshifted vampire... for what else could it be? Aishe's small feet carried her swiftly onto the beach where the canine suddenly drew up short.
It turned to her.
"Who are you?" She called again, her voice carrying over the wind and the waves.
It changed in front of her. Aishe watched, fascinated. The form that appeared was a familiar one although she hadn't seen him in some time. It baffled her. She hadn't expected him, of all people, to be here.
"Amir Rashid."
Amir
13 years ago
Aishe
13 years ago
"Just fine," Aishe said tersely, cautiously. She had determined upon meeting Amir months ago that he was potentially a much older vampire than she. That aura was still there, beneath the anger and negativity. That incredibly strong will she associated with those of great age, which they seemed to have to possess to make it so long. In Amir it was bright, coming through even beneath the blackness that signified lack of forgiveness and hatred. She didn't think those emotions were directed at her though. They were focused inward.
"I don't understand what you want from us," she said, taking a few steps closer to the man who looked far younger than she.
She stopped, then, and thought about it. Amir wasn't looking for her. He couldn't be. Aishe was no one in their world. Far too young, too inexperienced, she didn't know enough about anything to be of interest to anyone.
Amir was old though. And he could have stepped out of the same time as Kiamhaat. And the same place.
"You're looking for him," she said, surer of the idea as the words fell from her lips. "You're looking for Kem."
"I don't understand what you want from us," she said, taking a few steps closer to the man who looked far younger than she.
She stopped, then, and thought about it. Amir wasn't looking for her. He couldn't be. Aishe was no one in their world. Far too young, too inexperienced, she didn't know enough about anything to be of interest to anyone.
Amir was old though. And he could have stepped out of the same time as Kiamhaat. And the same place.
"You're looking for him," she said, surer of the idea as the words fell from her lips. "You're looking for Kem."
Amir
13 years ago
Aishe was smart to be cautious, Amir thought. She didn't give him the impression of an old soul but if she was young at least she wasn't stupid. He didn't like being pinned down at all. He could always keep running. But fleeing galled him more than feeling compelled to answer her did. So he let his smile fade some and gave her a short nod.
"I don't want anything from you. Or him."
Amir frowned. He hadn't ever prepared for this. Up until this point his plans for his lost child had included coercion, force, and potential violence. They hadn't included honesty.
There was a line though, a fine line between what was still his and what was Subira's. Normally Amir would have turned to Mara. She kept him focused, kept him remembering who and what he was. But he hadn't seen Mara in several nights. He knew where she was and he applauded that. It was good for her. And maybe it was good for Jin, too.
With her distracted though Amir was rapidly losing his identity, if it hadn't already been lost. This scheme of his was beyond risky. It was suicidal. So before he left he figured he had best say what he needed to say to the people who might want to hear it.
He just didn't know how.
"I don't want anything from you. Or him."
Amir frowned. He hadn't ever prepared for this. Up until this point his plans for his lost child had included coercion, force, and potential violence. They hadn't included honesty.
There was a line though, a fine line between what was still his and what was Subira's. Normally Amir would have turned to Mara. She kept him focused, kept him remembering who and what he was. But he hadn't seen Mara in several nights. He knew where she was and he applauded that. It was good for her. And maybe it was good for Jin, too.
With her distracted though Amir was rapidly losing his identity, if it hadn't already been lost. This scheme of his was beyond risky. It was suicidal. So before he left he figured he had best say what he needed to say to the people who might want to hear it.
He just didn't know how.
Aishe
13 years ago
They stared at each other a little more. Why Amir didn't say anything else, Aishe wasn't sure. His personality now was radically different from how he'd acted at the arcade where they'd met.
"You knew each other, didn't you?" she said with some wonder. She had never met anyone who knew Kem from a long time ago. Neither had he, for that matter. He had met Alfarinn when he was 800 years old. Up to that point he had known nothing about Clans, about other vampires, about what had made him him.
So then... how had they known each other? Wouldn't Kem had said something in the arcade?
"You knew each other, didn't you?" she said with some wonder. She had never met anyone who knew Kem from a long time ago. Neither had he, for that matter. He had met Alfarinn when he was 800 years old. Up to that point he had known nothing about Clans, about other vampires, about what had made him him.
So then... how had they known each other? Wouldn't Kem had said something in the arcade?
Amir
13 years ago
Amir shifted his weight from one side to the other, still perfectly balanced, always the fighter. He didn't like conversations like this. He didn't like admitting he'd made a mistake or had been less than right.
"No," he said flatly when Aishe asked him her question. "I barely knew him. He never knew me."
Amir turned and looked out at the water. Finally, he figured out how to do what he meant to do. He turned toward Aishe again and gestured. "Come with me."
When she hesitated he sighed. "I'm not out to get you. Let's sit. You'll want to hear what I have to say."
Not waiting to see if she followed him, because he knew she would, Amir walked to a fallen log half on the grass and half on the sand and sat, leaning over and clasping his hands together, resting his elbows on his knees.
"No," he said flatly when Aishe asked him her question. "I barely knew him. He never knew me."
Amir turned and looked out at the water. Finally, he figured out how to do what he meant to do. He turned toward Aishe again and gestured. "Come with me."
When she hesitated he sighed. "I'm not out to get you. Let's sit. You'll want to hear what I have to say."
Not waiting to see if she followed him, because he knew she would, Amir walked to a fallen log half on the grass and half on the sand and sat, leaning over and clasping his hands together, resting his elbows on his knees.
Aishe
13 years ago
This situation just got stranger and stranger, Aishe thought. She had an idea in the back of her head but could it possibly be? And why would Amir be here, talking to her?
When he gestured to her she froze. Her reluctance must have been obvious, for his sigh was audible and his demeanor somewhat impatient. He walked away from her, graceful as a cat, his aura swirling with colors that threatened to make her dizzy. It was as if she were reading more than one person at once.
She did follow, because she was curious and because in spite of the crazy aura around Amir, she wanted to know what he had to say. When he sat she did as well, about as far away as she could get, perched gingerly on the trunk of the fallen tree.
"I'm listening," she said cautiously.
When he gestured to her she froze. Her reluctance must have been obvious, for his sigh was audible and his demeanor somewhat impatient. He walked away from her, graceful as a cat, his aura swirling with colors that threatened to make her dizzy. It was as if she were reading more than one person at once.
She did follow, because she was curious and because in spite of the crazy aura around Amir, she wanted to know what he had to say. When he sat she did as well, about as far away as she could get, perched gingerly on the trunk of the fallen tree.
"I'm listening," she said cautiously.
Amir
13 years ago
Amir watched as Aishe continued to proceed with caution. Shrugging to himself he stared at the ground for a few minutes, sitting on the log and trying to figure out where to begin.
"Look," he finally said. "Over a thousand years ago, I was a young vampire. I followed my Creator's orders. I did what I was told to do and went where I was told to go."
Not that any of that had changed.
"My journeys took my often through Egypt. As you saw tonight, I have another form which made travel through that region... particularly pleasant."
He looked up at Aishe with a genuine smile, knowing she would understand his humor.
"Look," he finally said. "Over a thousand years ago, I was a young vampire. I followed my Creator's orders. I did what I was told to do and went where I was told to go."
Not that any of that had changed.
"My journeys took my often through Egypt. As you saw tonight, I have another form which made travel through that region... particularly pleasant."
He looked up at Aishe with a genuine smile, knowing she would understand his humor.
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe was somewhat surprised when Amir did finally start talking; he seemed remarkably conversational. Since he had only asked her to listen she did so. She thought about what he said and then smiled slowly.
"All right. Anubis," she said, watching as he glanced up and nodded his agreement.
"They worshiped you as a god?"
"All right. Anubis," she said, watching as he glanced up and nodded his agreement.
"They worshiped you as a god?"
Amir
13 years ago
Amir shrugged his shoulders at Aishe. "Close enough to one," he said. "I would sneak into the temple and appear mysteriously. They would feed me."
He allowed himself a slightly sheepish grin, falling back on boyish good looks to win his one-vampire audience over. "It worked for me. You know?"
When she nodded he continued. "Usually I killed them. Sometimes I let them go. My judgment was supposedly final and I admit, I played games. It was a power trip to me. What did I care what the humans thought? I'd been alive for hundreds of years."
He shrugged. "One of them, I did neither. I liked him. He looked different. Acted different. He was all kind of fucked up when they threw him into my chamber but he was mumbling some nonsense about how his sister was innocent. He opened his eyes once, and I thought he saw me. But maybe not. At any rate I didn't kill him. Obviously."
He allowed himself a slightly sheepish grin, falling back on boyish good looks to win his one-vampire audience over. "It worked for me. You know?"
When she nodded he continued. "Usually I killed them. Sometimes I let them go. My judgment was supposedly final and I admit, I played games. It was a power trip to me. What did I care what the humans thought? I'd been alive for hundreds of years."
He shrugged. "One of them, I did neither. I liked him. He looked different. Acted different. He was all kind of fucked up when they threw him into my chamber but he was mumbling some nonsense about how his sister was innocent. He opened his eyes once, and I thought he saw me. But maybe not. At any rate I didn't kill him. Obviously."
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe was having a hard time believing her ears. Amir was talking to the wrong person. He should have Kiamhaat out here, not her. Why was he telling these things to her?
As the small, dark-haired man spoke she felt the chill of the night air quite keenly. She wanted to stop him but she didn't. It was too fascinating.
"You turned him," she breathed softly. "Why did you turn him?"
What Kem would give to know this. Or not. She didn't know, she wasn't certain. Maybe Kem wasn't certain either.
"Why couldn't you have let him go?"
As the small, dark-haired man spoke she felt the chill of the night air quite keenly. She wanted to stop him but she didn't. It was too fascinating.
"You turned him," she breathed softly. "Why did you turn him?"
What Kem would give to know this. Or not. She didn't know, she wasn't certain. Maybe Kem wasn't certain either.
"Why couldn't you have let him go?"
Amir
13 years ago
He saw understanding there. And anger, a reflection of what Kiamhaat must have felt. What he must still feel. Amir wasn't going to do the whole 'put myself in your shoes' nonsense. Kiamhaat was a fool if after all these years he still couldn't embrace the beauty of who and what he was.
"He was marked for death. They would never have let him go," Amir said. "Yes. I turned him. I gave him life."
He raised a dark brow at Aishe. "You think he'd have wanted it differently?"
"He was marked for death. They would never have let him go," Amir said. "Yes. I turned him. I gave him life."
He raised a dark brow at Aishe. "You think he'd have wanted it differently?"
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe felt heat in the pit of her stomach like a smoldering coal. " I know he would have wanted it differently," she said.
She turned to face Amir. "He killed his family that night. You killed his family that night. Of course he'd have wanted it to be different. He would have given his life for them in a second."
She turned to face Amir. "He killed his family that night. You killed his family that night. Of course he'd have wanted it to be different. He would have given his life for them in a second."
Amir
13 years ago
Amir regarded Aishe curiously. "Brave words, from the woman he lives with now. If he'd died then, what would you have now?"
He shook his head at Aishe. Not all of Kiamhaat's family, he wanted to say. Just the man and his only daughter. How could he go wrong there? Sarcasm off, Amir.
He shook his head at Aishe. Not all of Kiamhaat's family, he wanted to say. Just the man and his only daughter. How could he go wrong there? Sarcasm off, Amir.
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe stood, irritated. "Ass. I love him. Don't think for a second I would regret it if his life had gone differently. He had a wife and a family he loved. You took it away from him. Sure, he's with me now and I appreciate that but if you think I'm going to thank you for it..."
She frowned and turned to walk away, but he stopped her.
She frowned and turned to walk away, but he stopped her.
Amir
13 years ago
Amir sighed, impatient, but he stood when Aishe did and reached out, grabbing her hand. "Aishe, wait. Hear me out."
This wasn't the way he wanted anything to go. He certainly hadn't planned on begging her to stay. The very idea made him scowl. But he held her, staring at her with his dark, intense eyes when she glared down at his hand and then back to him.
"He was already gone," Amir said, each word firm. "Nothing I did at that point would have changed that. I couldn't let him go. Maybe he preferred death." Amir shrugged. "I had a choice and I made it."
He dropped her hand. He didn't think she would leave. If she did, she'd never get this chance again. That was a certainty.
This wasn't the way he wanted anything to go. He certainly hadn't planned on begging her to stay. The very idea made him scowl. But he held her, staring at her with his dark, intense eyes when she glared down at his hand and then back to him.
"He was already gone," Amir said, each word firm. "Nothing I did at that point would have changed that. I couldn't let him go. Maybe he preferred death." Amir shrugged. "I had a choice and I made it."
He dropped her hand. He didn't think she would leave. If she did, she'd never get this chance again. That was a certainty.
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe stopped when Amir caught her hand, looking down at it and back up to him without saying anything. He wasn't hurting her. His aura flashed with many colors that were confusing to read but at the moment the strong-willed red shone brightly, along with tiny flashes of truthful white. Everything else sank to the background for a moment.
He dropped her hand and she considered. When would she get a chance to hear this all again? Probably never. Still offering him a hard glare she sat back down.
"Fine. You turned him, and then you left him. That was a cruel thing to do."
Unforgivable in her opinion, but then, she viewed it from the perspective of someone whose own turning had been as gentle, careful, and tender as it could have been. How could she not measure all Creators against Christian? And how could they not be found lacking? She allowed Amir a tiny bit of the benefit of doubt. Christian, he was not.
He dropped her hand and she considered. When would she get a chance to hear this all again? Probably never. Still offering him a hard glare she sat back down.
"Fine. You turned him, and then you left him. That was a cruel thing to do."
Unforgivable in her opinion, but then, she viewed it from the perspective of someone whose own turning had been as gentle, careful, and tender as it could have been. How could she not measure all Creators against Christian? And how could they not be found lacking? She allowed Amir a tiny bit of the benefit of doubt. Christian, he was not.
Amir
13 years ago
Amir frowned. "I didn't abandon him," he said. "I had to wait until the next evening to find him and he was gone from the city by then. Have you ever tried to physically track someone through a desert?"
There had been no trail to follow, not in the sand, not twelve hours after a windy Egyptian day. Amir had actually looked. "I didn't even know his name," he said with a dry laugh. "My job for Anantya took me away from the area. I couldn't spare several decades to look for him."
He shrugged helplessly. Amir wasn't going to apologize. He had a job to do for his Clan. If he'd had the leisure he probably would have spent more time looking for Kiamhaat.
"If he'd gone anywhere but Italia I might also have found him. But my job took me through Africa and Asia, not Europe."
There had been no trail to follow, not in the sand, not twelve hours after a windy Egyptian day. Amir had actually looked. "I didn't even know his name," he said with a dry laugh. "My job for Anantya took me away from the area. I couldn't spare several decades to look for him."
He shrugged helplessly. Amir wasn't going to apologize. He had a job to do for his Clan. If he'd had the leisure he probably would have spent more time looking for Kiamhaat.
"If he'd gone anywhere but Italia I might also have found him. But my job took me through Africa and Asia, not Europe."
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe heard the combined notes of irritation and frustration in Amir's voice. It was difficult to say with his aura shifting so much, but he seemed sincere. She couldn't see anything about him that indicated falsehood.
Could it be that Kem was holding a 1600 year old grudge against someone who'd just made a mistake? She didn't think he even considered the idea that the person who'd turned him so long ago was alive, well, and living in Nachton.
"And later?"
If Amir had wanted to find Kem surely he could have at a later point. Aishe didn't understand why he had never found his missing vampire. What work did he do for his Clan?
Could it be that Kem was holding a 1600 year old grudge against someone who'd just made a mistake? She didn't think he even considered the idea that the person who'd turned him so long ago was alive, well, and living in Nachton.
"And later?"
If Amir had wanted to find Kem surely he could have at a later point. Aishe didn't understand why he had never found his missing vampire. What work did he do for his Clan?
Amir
13 years ago
"Later," Amir snorted. He was only willing to go so far. "Later, I assumed he'd either figured it out, or he was dead."
He wasn't being intentionally cold; it was just the way they lived. Either you figured out very quickly what you were, or you died horribly. By the time Amir even had a chance to think about Kiamhaat years had passed. He might feel guilty about that on some level... but not right now. Clearly Kiamhaat had survived. He should be happy about his life.
Amir looked at Aishe. "I didn't set out with the intention of ruining what he had," he said. "I won't take credit for the next few hundred years though. That was all him."
He wasn't being intentionally cold; it was just the way they lived. Either you figured out very quickly what you were, or you died horribly. By the time Amir even had a chance to think about Kiamhaat years had passed. He might feel guilty about that on some level... but not right now. Clearly Kiamhaat had survived. He should be happy about his life.
Amir looked at Aishe. "I didn't set out with the intention of ruining what he had," he said. "I won't take credit for the next few hundred years though. That was all him."
Aishe
13 years ago
Aishe was slightly disgusted with Amir. In her opinion, his people skills had been lacking sixteen hundred years ago and had made no noticeable improvement in the last several hundred years. She could not imagine what could possibly be more important than finding the person whose life you had just irrevocably altered and explaining things to them a teeny bit. Granted, she was a very young vampire and perhaps such weighty matters were too much for her youthful inexperienced brain to handle...
She rolled her eyes internally, still watching Amir as he spoke. This might be easier to take if he showed any sign of remorse at all. As it was he seemed thoroughly unrepentant.
Crossing her arms Aishe asked, "So why are you telling me all of this? Why me, and why now?"
She rolled her eyes internally, still watching Amir as he spoke. This might be easier to take if he showed any sign of remorse at all. As it was he seemed thoroughly unrepentant.
Crossing her arms Aishe asked, "So why are you telling me all of this? Why me, and why now?"