Saturday, July 30th, 2005
Waking up in Meegan's bed is quite an experience. Having her curled next to or under me, with the sun shining through those huge windows, illuminating her face...
I don't think I'll mention the bruises I noted on her neck or breast. I'm honestly not quite sure how she'd react.
We went to lunch after another morning romp and mutual shower (I gave her another ballchain treatment, she really does like it) and she lamented that she didn't have a strapon of her own... I told her very quietly that I trusted her enough that I think - no, I said, I'm pretty sure - that I'd want her to make love to me that way.
Her eyebrows raised and she hugged me.
We did another shopping binge, but didn't buy so much clothes as windowshop for possible decorating items for my upcoming new place. She's very proud of me that I'm getting out of that... Wait, let me think of exactly what she said... "Deplorable hole. Not that I'm judging or putting you down, I know what it's like to have to live at the bare minimum of your means to survive."
I think she'd like to go with me when I go new-place hunting. I'll have to ask her tomorrow when we go to the marina.
Rachyl's Journal (private, closed, no replies)
(( This is the IC journal of Rachyl. If any of this OOC-ly learned information should appear or be mentioned IC, heads will be bonked or :stabbed . None of this information is available IC unless pre-arranged by Rachyl.
That said, enjoy. :mrgreen: ))
(( Thanks to Meegan for assistance with the disclaimer. :) ))
Rachyl
19 years ago
Rachyl
19 years ago
Sunday, July 31st, 2005
Unfortunately our plans at the marina were cut short by hurricane-force winds, and Meegan and I couldn't go sailing. Jacob's brother owned the marina, and even he had been surprised by the sudden appearance of the strong winds and choppy bay.
We perused a couple apartment books while we snuggled. Dinner was quiet; I made a simple broiled chicken breast with assorted steamed vegetables. Fresh baked bread from the bakery down the street and white wine topped us off, and we indulged "rather sinfully" as Meegan called it in white chocolate ice cream.
Unfortunately our plans at the marina were cut short by hurricane-force winds, and Meegan and I couldn't go sailing. Jacob's brother owned the marina, and even he had been surprised by the sudden appearance of the strong winds and choppy bay.
We perused a couple apartment books while we snuggled. Dinner was quiet; I made a simple broiled chicken breast with assorted steamed vegetables. Fresh baked bread from the bakery down the street and white wine topped us off, and we indulged "rather sinfully" as Meegan called it in white chocolate ice cream.
Rachyl
19 years ago
Monday, August 1st, 2005
Work was quiet and boring and yet fun at the same time.
Meegan let me go home. Rather, I found out she was going to stay late but she told me in no uncertain terms to go home. So I did, giving her a hug and a kiss as I left with Dill. I picked up some food for him on the way home and was glad I'd gotten a waterbowl for these occasions.
Stopped at Blockbuster and picked up 40 Days and 40 Nights... quite a fun movie though I hadn't expected it to be as... male centric as it was.
.... Later entry: I was woken up just now by a phone call from Nachton PD about two murders at the factory. Told them I'd answer questions in the morning as well as provide security tapes. ... Though why they wanted to wait til morning, I don't quite understand...
Work was quiet and boring and yet fun at the same time.
Meegan let me go home. Rather, I found out she was going to stay late but she told me in no uncertain terms to go home. So I did, giving her a hug and a kiss as I left with Dill. I picked up some food for him on the way home and was glad I'd gotten a waterbowl for these occasions.
Stopped at Blockbuster and picked up 40 Days and 40 Nights... quite a fun movie though I hadn't expected it to be as... male centric as it was.
.... Later entry: I was woken up just now by a phone call from Nachton PD about two murders at the factory. Told them I'd answer questions in the morning as well as provide security tapes. ... Though why they wanted to wait til morning, I don't quite understand...
Rachyl
19 years ago
Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005
I'm writing this actually on the 3rd while Regina talks to her supervisor.
Yesterday was... interesting. A phone call from Meegan, my usual daily duties interrupted by homicide detectives, the realization that Meegan found a man... And two murders at my company.
I dispatched an email to the company basically saying "we offer our condolences and here's what we're doing to make sure it's not going to happen again..." then had a meeting with the team leads to indicate Meegan's reduced schedule... Meegan called back to tell me she was hiring me a bodyguard and to take care of Dill. (I'm tearing up again.) And eventually the workday ended. I met Jack, my first bodyguard, and we went to the dog park to walk Dill...
Where I was almost assaulted by one of the attackers in the security video from Gothic-Ah. Somehow I kept my cool, and from the dream I had earlier in the day on Tuesday I knew something was different about him... So I didn't fight back, I just talked calmly... and he eventually let me go. Turns out he wanted my help... I let him into Meegan's place; I figure she'll get a kick out of knowing that the man who accosted her is staying at her apartment...
Had pizza for dinner; I was starved. Met Regina, Jack's relief. Nice lady. We chatted for a while, watched a movie. I went to bed.
I'm writing this actually on the 3rd while Regina talks to her supervisor.
Yesterday was... interesting. A phone call from Meegan, my usual daily duties interrupted by homicide detectives, the realization that Meegan found a man... And two murders at my company.
I dispatched an email to the company basically saying "we offer our condolences and here's what we're doing to make sure it's not going to happen again..." then had a meeting with the team leads to indicate Meegan's reduced schedule... Meegan called back to tell me she was hiring me a bodyguard and to take care of Dill. (I'm tearing up again.) And eventually the workday ended. I met Jack, my first bodyguard, and we went to the dog park to walk Dill...
Where I was almost assaulted by one of the attackers in the security video from Gothic-Ah. Somehow I kept my cool, and from the dream I had earlier in the day on Tuesday I knew something was different about him... So I didn't fight back, I just talked calmly... and he eventually let me go. Turns out he wanted my help... I let him into Meegan's place; I figure she'll get a kick out of knowing that the man who accosted her is staying at her apartment...
Had pizza for dinner; I was starved. Met Regina, Jack's relief. Nice lady. We chatted for a while, watched a movie. I went to bed.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Friday, December 2nd, 2005
A lot has happened in the last few months.
Soon after Meegan started staying at the Mansion, I was invited over for dinner, and many different things were revealed, including the true nature of our stalker. And... a few other people.
A single day after that, Pauly destroyed Meegan's condo. He even killed someone.
I discovered a few weeks later that Meegan's downstairs friend (the one who'd worshipped her) had come back. I wonder if he ever met up with Veronica...
Life was pretty "normal" as "normal" can be considered "normal" for living in a gimungous mansion, being chauffeured to work, and spending time with Dill and Meegan and... Mr. Swiftwood.
The invitation to Connie and Nyra's Halloween party was an amazingly welcome distraction. Even the Halloween Ball Meegan was invited to was a fun event. To the Ball I wore a mid-40s outfit that I rather liked, though I liked my outfit for Connie and Nyra's even more... Psychedelic disco diva! Whee!
Wow Connie and Nyra sure can throw a party. I love the ship-in-a-bottle I won! And Meegan got a ceramic pumpkin.
That night when I took Meegan home she was so completely drunk... I felt bad for her. She knew something was wrong somehow, but couldn't articulate it... And then in the morning after she sobered up a little she found a note from Aron saying he'd had to leave town on business. Of course this tore Meegan up, and she withdrew into herself. She needed help with almost everything... Bathing, eating, dressing... It tore ME up to see her this way. But I knew I couldn't leave her. If I did... I wouldn't be her friend. She needed me...
Anyway. That first Monday of November she called me into her office to tell me she wanted to plan a party. "A big party. A gala!" I made a joke about a childrens' charity... NBITES? Yeah. Nachton Benefits Infants, Toddlers, and Everyone Small. We both got a good laugh out of it. It was nice to see her almost her old self.
So now, today, we've got all our calls made for donations... we booked Founders' Square... Invitations have been sent out... I chose my dress... Meegan knew immediately what hers was going to be.
And so I decided to catch myself up on four months of journal in two pages...
A lot has happened in the last few months.
Soon after Meegan started staying at the Mansion, I was invited over for dinner, and many different things were revealed, including the true nature of our stalker. And... a few other people.
A single day after that, Pauly destroyed Meegan's condo. He even killed someone.
I discovered a few weeks later that Meegan's downstairs friend (the one who'd worshipped her) had come back. I wonder if he ever met up with Veronica...
Life was pretty "normal" as "normal" can be considered "normal" for living in a gimungous mansion, being chauffeured to work, and spending time with Dill and Meegan and... Mr. Swiftwood.
The invitation to Connie and Nyra's Halloween party was an amazingly welcome distraction. Even the Halloween Ball Meegan was invited to was a fun event. To the Ball I wore a mid-40s outfit that I rather liked, though I liked my outfit for Connie and Nyra's even more... Psychedelic disco diva! Whee!
Wow Connie and Nyra sure can throw a party. I love the ship-in-a-bottle I won! And Meegan got a ceramic pumpkin.
That night when I took Meegan home she was so completely drunk... I felt bad for her. She knew something was wrong somehow, but couldn't articulate it... And then in the morning after she sobered up a little she found a note from Aron saying he'd had to leave town on business. Of course this tore Meegan up, and she withdrew into herself. She needed help with almost everything... Bathing, eating, dressing... It tore ME up to see her this way. But I knew I couldn't leave her. If I did... I wouldn't be her friend. She needed me...
Anyway. That first Monday of November she called me into her office to tell me she wanted to plan a party. "A big party. A gala!" I made a joke about a childrens' charity... NBITES? Yeah. Nachton Benefits Infants, Toddlers, and Everyone Small. We both got a good laugh out of it. It was nice to see her almost her old self.
So now, today, we've got all our calls made for donations... we booked Founders' Square... Invitations have been sent out... I chose my dress... Meegan knew immediately what hers was going to be.
And so I decided to catch myself up on four months of journal in two pages...
Rachyl
18 years ago
Tuesday, January 31st, 2006
Somewhere in my previous entry I completely neglected to mention several huge developments.
That same day Meegan suggested the Charity Gala, she also suggested we buy a house. Which completely shocked me.
The Gala was an amazing success. We raised over seventy thousand dollars for the Childrens' Hospital. I also got to dance for quite a while with Nyra. She's an amazing dance partner. I told her she and I should go out sometime, maybe ballroom dancing or something. I really do feel bad for both her and Connie as I don't believe Connie's able to dance.
The night after the Gala, we moved out of Aron's Mansion to the Piazza. We got one of the largest suites and set up a Christmas tree. It was rather fun, having Christmas in a hotel.
It was also after the Gala that Meegan joined me in bed, weeping silently. I had to turn her down, though, and we talked all through Christmas weekend, about more than we'd talked about in the past two months of living at The Manor.
I couldn't do anything but forgive her. I knew she did what I was doing - she followed her heart to Aron, even if she couldn't understand why. I kind of did, but her fall was so sudden, so out of left field, I really was shocked, to say the least. I mean, she had had that one lover after our original "get together" with Veronica, the week I started at Gothic-Ah... but Aron really got under her skin. In more ways than one.
And while I will never ask her about the rest of that...
I forgave her.
I love her, after all. With everything that I am.
So, ramblemuch aside, we had an amazing Christmas and New Year's. She got me a great yellow winter coat, short enough to be comfortable, and somehow even correctly sized to allow my breasts to fit without straining the zipper. With matching gloves, too. I felt kind of silly; quite like a kid on her way to third grade... but I love it. It's very warm. The silver sequined spider webbed bodice with purple crushed velvet skirt from the Gala was quite a surprise. I haven't worn it yet. Maybe as a special surprise for Meegan for when we get our bed.
So the other big news - We bought a house! Just today, before lunch. It's a grand, lovely home, and I know it will certainly be our home. It feels like we belong here, even with minimal furniture and nothing on the walls. Dill had a joygasm when he landed in the yard... and he's had a ball sniffing around every room.
Oop, the delivery truck's here with the mattress, and Meegan's out of the bathroom. Closing up.
Somewhere in my previous entry I completely neglected to mention several huge developments.
That same day Meegan suggested the Charity Gala, she also suggested we buy a house. Which completely shocked me.
The Gala was an amazing success. We raised over seventy thousand dollars for the Childrens' Hospital. I also got to dance for quite a while with Nyra. She's an amazing dance partner. I told her she and I should go out sometime, maybe ballroom dancing or something. I really do feel bad for both her and Connie as I don't believe Connie's able to dance.
The night after the Gala, we moved out of Aron's Mansion to the Piazza. We got one of the largest suites and set up a Christmas tree. It was rather fun, having Christmas in a hotel.
It was also after the Gala that Meegan joined me in bed, weeping silently. I had to turn her down, though, and we talked all through Christmas weekend, about more than we'd talked about in the past two months of living at The Manor.
I couldn't do anything but forgive her. I knew she did what I was doing - she followed her heart to Aron, even if she couldn't understand why. I kind of did, but her fall was so sudden, so out of left field, I really was shocked, to say the least. I mean, she had had that one lover after our original "get together" with Veronica, the week I started at Gothic-Ah... but Aron really got under her skin. In more ways than one.
And while I will never ask her about the rest of that...
I forgave her.
I love her, after all. With everything that I am.
So, ramblemuch aside, we had an amazing Christmas and New Year's. She got me a great yellow winter coat, short enough to be comfortable, and somehow even correctly sized to allow my breasts to fit without straining the zipper. With matching gloves, too. I felt kind of silly; quite like a kid on her way to third grade... but I love it. It's very warm. The silver sequined spider webbed bodice with purple crushed velvet skirt from the Gala was quite a surprise. I haven't worn it yet. Maybe as a special surprise for Meegan for when we get our bed.
So the other big news - We bought a house! Just today, before lunch. It's a grand, lovely home, and I know it will certainly be our home. It feels like we belong here, even with minimal furniture and nothing on the walls. Dill had a joygasm when he landed in the yard... and he's had a ball sniffing around every room.
Oop, the delivery truck's here with the mattress, and Meegan's out of the bathroom. Closing up.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, February 22th 2006
The house has been amazing. Almost half of the rooms are decorated now.
Our life is just beginning. We decided - in the midst of our lovemaking - to have a baby. I'm going to be the mother. Er, I'll be the one to carry the child. I always knew that if I were to have a relationship with Meegan, and we were to have children, that I would be. It's been a rather constant turnon. So much so that last night, while Meegan worked in the office (her studio isn't finished yet) I had to keep trying to distract myself so I wouldn't jump her at her desk or go solo til I passed out. It worked, until about dinner time...
Needless to say, dinner was late last night.
So just a little while ago we got back from the Sperm Bank. Meegan wanted to read through the pamphlets first; I gave her full reign as the Chinese food from last night gave my stomach the woofles.
We finalized our "donor's specifications" (I shock myself, I keep making it sound like computer parts or a car) and we're both excited. I had the brief feeling that it's kind of odd to be getting pregnant from a syringe instead of a penis, but then I looked from the description of the procedure to Meegan and all my doubts went away.
Well about the physical part of the impregnation, anyway.
I should call my Mom. I still need to, especially after the dream I'd had yesterday. To dream that my own mother is pregnant with her lesbian lover's baby... is just beyond strange. And then to have the dream move onto both mothers dying, leaving Meegan and I their daughter - my half-sister - was just too weird for words. I haven't told Meegan yet. I'm sure the whole single-baby thing is enough for her to process; I can't imagine how she'd deal with a second.
I should ask her. I do hope that any thoughts, any doubts, she might have, she shares with me. Communication is paramount. Communication, trust, and love.
Twenty days... Hopefully I'll be pregnant. Meanwhile, we're having some of the best sex... Come to think of it we need to set some ground rules for the next nine or ten months. And have a Girl Bash. We need to have Nyra and Connie over. Kind of a end-of-bachelorettehood party. Or a pre-baby shower. Well, we'll figure it out.
The house has been amazing. Almost half of the rooms are decorated now.
Our life is just beginning. We decided - in the midst of our lovemaking - to have a baby. I'm going to be the mother. Er, I'll be the one to carry the child. I always knew that if I were to have a relationship with Meegan, and we were to have children, that I would be. It's been a rather constant turnon. So much so that last night, while Meegan worked in the office (her studio isn't finished yet) I had to keep trying to distract myself so I wouldn't jump her at her desk or go solo til I passed out. It worked, until about dinner time...
Needless to say, dinner was late last night.
So just a little while ago we got back from the Sperm Bank. Meegan wanted to read through the pamphlets first; I gave her full reign as the Chinese food from last night gave my stomach the woofles.
We finalized our "donor's specifications" (I shock myself, I keep making it sound like computer parts or a car) and we're both excited. I had the brief feeling that it's kind of odd to be getting pregnant from a syringe instead of a penis, but then I looked from the description of the procedure to Meegan and all my doubts went away.
Well about the physical part of the impregnation, anyway.
I should call my Mom. I still need to, especially after the dream I'd had yesterday. To dream that my own mother is pregnant with her lesbian lover's baby... is just beyond strange. And then to have the dream move onto both mothers dying, leaving Meegan and I their daughter - my half-sister - was just too weird for words. I haven't told Meegan yet. I'm sure the whole single-baby thing is enough for her to process; I can't imagine how she'd deal with a second.
I should ask her. I do hope that any thoughts, any doubts, she might have, she shares with me. Communication is paramount. Communication, trust, and love.
Twenty days... Hopefully I'll be pregnant. Meanwhile, we're having some of the best sex... Come to think of it we need to set some ground rules for the next nine or ten months. And have a Girl Bash. We need to have Nyra and Connie over. Kind of a end-of-bachelorettehood party. Or a pre-baby shower. Well, we'll figure it out.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, June 14th, 2006
It is strange, standing in the driveway while waiting for Meegan to pull her baby out. Er, that is, back her brand new, Breakwater Blue Lexus out of the garage, where it sits next to my own brand new, Copper Red Mica Mazda CX7. Matches my hair.
It's even stranger, sitting here in the fertility doctor's waiting room, writing in my journal while Meegan is on the phone plotting some child-based perk or another, or dealing with some new office-based tangle... But then I have kind of skipped a few months, haven't I?
Shortly after we moved in, I decided it would probably be in my best interests to overcome my fear of driving. After all, I'd spent how many years in therapy for my father's leaving us, and while I certainly had dealt with the fear of driving... I hadn't done anything about it. I still rode my bike, or the bus, or took a taxi. Or walked.
So, soon after we decided to have a baby I asked Connie to teach me how to drive. In the meantime, she and Meegan became girlfriends, and Nyra and I did as well. I took Nyra on her first Personal Shopper shopping trip. It started out rough, I'll be honest, but we got her measured and into some quite lovely outfits. We even got back to Gothic-Ah in time to give her a tour, and also she picked out a couple dresses from the "surplus room."
We celebrated Nyra's birthday with a quiet "Girls' Night In".
Meanwhile, efforts to become pregnant moved along, but even as of Meegan's birthday on June 3rd, we're still hoping.
For my birthday, all I wanted was to not have sex. I know, it was an odd request, but still, it was really all I wanted. Meegan pampered me so wonderfully... We did more hugging and cuddling and making out, though, than we usually do... It was very, very refreshing. (I think we've learned from that, because there've been times when we're watching a movie together or cooking or whatever, and we just make out like teenagers.) The hammock in the back yard is a great cuddle spot!
Meegan's birthday was very domestic and very fun, too. We indulged sinfully, ordering in all three meals. We walked Dill, exploring the neighborhood a little, played board games (damn that woman is awesome at Monopoly), napping, reading (we're slowly filling up the Library in the office). Chinese takeout, chocolate cake... Hot sex.
Meegan hasn't been sleeping well. I think it's the fact that I'm not pregnant that's bothering her... She's been occasionally irritable, but I try to console her. After all, she's not the one whose body is affected! I try to give her space when we talk about baby stuff and she gets kind of closed off and defensive. She's come up with some wonderful gothy maternitywear in her frustration, though, and I can't wait to wear a lot of it!
She worries too much. It's adorable, sometimes, but a lot of the time, I wish she'd just relax.
I think one of the things that's hurting her the most would be her need to find a new church. I'm not a fan of all the hypocritical rules that religion imposes, and I'm glad it was one thing my mother never held me to.
I had one of the seamstresses in the office make me a half dozen hairbands and some scrunchies (time warp for certain.) Each is one third blue, one third pink, and one third rainbow... Fitting, I think.
I wonder if Nachton has a Rainbow Pride parade?
I just had the most amazing idea! I need to tell Meegan when she gets off the phone.
It is strange, standing in the driveway while waiting for Meegan to pull her baby out. Er, that is, back her brand new, Breakwater Blue Lexus out of the garage, where it sits next to my own brand new, Copper Red Mica Mazda CX7. Matches my hair.
It's even stranger, sitting here in the fertility doctor's waiting room, writing in my journal while Meegan is on the phone plotting some child-based perk or another, or dealing with some new office-based tangle... But then I have kind of skipped a few months, haven't I?
Shortly after we moved in, I decided it would probably be in my best interests to overcome my fear of driving. After all, I'd spent how many years in therapy for my father's leaving us, and while I certainly had dealt with the fear of driving... I hadn't done anything about it. I still rode my bike, or the bus, or took a taxi. Or walked.
So, soon after we decided to have a baby I asked Connie to teach me how to drive. In the meantime, she and Meegan became girlfriends, and Nyra and I did as well. I took Nyra on her first Personal Shopper shopping trip. It started out rough, I'll be honest, but we got her measured and into some quite lovely outfits. We even got back to Gothic-Ah in time to give her a tour, and also she picked out a couple dresses from the "surplus room."
We celebrated Nyra's birthday with a quiet "Girls' Night In".
Meanwhile, efforts to become pregnant moved along, but even as of Meegan's birthday on June 3rd, we're still hoping.
For my birthday, all I wanted was to not have sex. I know, it was an odd request, but still, it was really all I wanted. Meegan pampered me so wonderfully... We did more hugging and cuddling and making out, though, than we usually do... It was very, very refreshing. (I think we've learned from that, because there've been times when we're watching a movie together or cooking or whatever, and we just make out like teenagers.) The hammock in the back yard is a great cuddle spot!
Meegan's birthday was very domestic and very fun, too. We indulged sinfully, ordering in all three meals. We walked Dill, exploring the neighborhood a little, played board games (damn that woman is awesome at Monopoly), napping, reading (we're slowly filling up the Library in the office). Chinese takeout, chocolate cake... Hot sex.
Meegan hasn't been sleeping well. I think it's the fact that I'm not pregnant that's bothering her... She's been occasionally irritable, but I try to console her. After all, she's not the one whose body is affected! I try to give her space when we talk about baby stuff and she gets kind of closed off and defensive. She's come up with some wonderful gothy maternitywear in her frustration, though, and I can't wait to wear a lot of it!
She worries too much. It's adorable, sometimes, but a lot of the time, I wish she'd just relax.
I think one of the things that's hurting her the most would be her need to find a new church. I'm not a fan of all the hypocritical rules that religion imposes, and I'm glad it was one thing my mother never held me to.
I had one of the seamstresses in the office make me a half dozen hairbands and some scrunchies (time warp for certain.) Each is one third blue, one third pink, and one third rainbow... Fitting, I think.
I wonder if Nachton has a Rainbow Pride parade?
I just had the most amazing idea! I need to tell Meegan when she gets off the phone.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, June 14th, 2006 - Later that day
The appointment with the fertility doctor went as we expected. I'm not pregnant. He went through this whole 'supposed to make you feel better' shpiel about how my uterus is viable and capable of supporting life, but for some reason the donor sperm wasn't fertilizing my eggs.
My great idea was shattered and shared at the same time; the doctor offered my own idea as a possible solution.
Just on a lark I was going to say "hey maybe we should harvest some of Meegan's eggs, this way if there's a problem with mine..." but the doctor said something along the same lines even though he didn't make it sound like my fault.
So Meegan got started on those fertility drugs and we set up an appointment to have her eggs harvested.
The appointment with the fertility doctor went as we expected. I'm not pregnant. He went through this whole 'supposed to make you feel better' shpiel about how my uterus is viable and capable of supporting life, but for some reason the donor sperm wasn't fertilizing my eggs.
My great idea was shattered and shared at the same time; the doctor offered my own idea as a possible solution.
Just on a lark I was going to say "hey maybe we should harvest some of Meegan's eggs, this way if there's a problem with mine..." but the doctor said something along the same lines even though he didn't make it sound like my fault.
So Meegan got started on those fertility drugs and we set up an appointment to have her eggs harvested.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, July 5th, 2006
Meegan's harvesting went well; just under ten days to my next ovulation and we'll see what happens.
More and more baby stuff arrives by the week. You'd think we're planning for a dozen kids, but we're really only planning on one, and we just have enough 'stuff' and supplies to work us through the first few months. Diapers, bottles, toys, music, mobiles.
We tried sitting in again on the expectant mother class but we felt really out of place - not being pregnant ourselves - so we contented each other with strong drinks, a hot shower, and bad late night movies that we were both too drunk to watch and too sober not to laugh at.
Meegan's harvesting went well; just under ten days to my next ovulation and we'll see what happens.
More and more baby stuff arrives by the week. You'd think we're planning for a dozen kids, but we're really only planning on one, and we just have enough 'stuff' and supplies to work us through the first few months. Diapers, bottles, toys, music, mobiles.
We tried sitting in again on the expectant mother class but we felt really out of place - not being pregnant ourselves - so we contented each other with strong drinks, a hot shower, and bad late night movies that we were both too drunk to watch and too sober not to laugh at.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, July 12th, 2006
It made me smile when Meegan called Connie early this morning (during her seemingly regular bout of pre-dawn insomnia). I don't think she knows she woke me up, but it warms me to know that she's not the anti-social socialite she thinks she is. It also makes me glad that she has a friend other than myself. I called Connie at the same time to wish her HBD; I knew she wouldn't click over to her voicemail while on the phone with Meegan. Then after I woke up I escaped downstairs to fix a quick breakfast and sent her an e-card.
It made me smile when Meegan called Connie early this morning (during her seemingly regular bout of pre-dawn insomnia). I don't think she knows she woke me up, but it warms me to know that she's not the anti-social socialite she thinks she is. It also makes me glad that she has a friend other than myself. I called Connie at the same time to wish her HBD; I knew she wouldn't click over to her voicemail while on the phone with Meegan. Then after I woke up I escaped downstairs to fix a quick breakfast and sent her an e-card.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Friday, July 14th, 2006
Our dual appointment was today. Meegan's eggs were harvested. I got another implantation. It still hurts, and I know neither of us will be doing much comforting tonight when we get home, but we're doing it together... I can't shake the feeling we're finally in this together. I mean, I knew we were before... But now that we're having a baby from both of us... it makes it extra togetherly, you know?
I'm confusing myself, probably from the meds and the serious need to get some action which unfortunately is currently denied me.
It still gives me a bit of a skeevy wiggle when the doctor brings out the sample tube full of semen... I can't believe I used to swallow that stuff. Well, maybe I can, I did kind of enjoy it...
I need to abandon that line of thought because I'm just grossing myself out, dredging up old memories...
Our dual appointment was today. Meegan's eggs were harvested. I got another implantation. It still hurts, and I know neither of us will be doing much comforting tonight when we get home, but we're doing it together... I can't shake the feeling we're finally in this together. I mean, I knew we were before... But now that we're having a baby from both of us... it makes it extra togetherly, you know?
I'm confusing myself, probably from the meds and the serious need to get some action which unfortunately is currently denied me.
It still gives me a bit of a skeevy wiggle when the doctor brings out the sample tube full of semen... I can't believe I used to swallow that stuff. Well, maybe I can, I did kind of enjoy it...
I need to abandon that line of thought because I'm just grossing myself out, dredging up old memories...
Rachyl
18 years ago
Monday, July 31st, 2006
She's been beside herself all day. Even at work. I finally convinced her to go to the movies with me.
Later...
We saw Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest. I liked it a lot. Johnny Depp is so wonderful in his role and even that other guy... I can't remember his name. Anyway. I could empathize with his decisions. Doesn't mean I liked them.
We're pregnant! Meegan paced almost the full three minutes of the toothbrush timer and finally, the colors changed.
She's been beside herself all day. Even at work. I finally convinced her to go to the movies with me.
Later...
We saw Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest. I liked it a lot. Johnny Depp is so wonderful in his role and even that other guy... I can't remember his name. Anyway. I could empathize with his decisions. Doesn't mean I liked them.
We're pregnant! Meegan paced almost the full three minutes of the toothbrush timer and finally, the colors changed.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Saturday, September 2nd, 2006
We got a room at the Marriott Times Square for Fashion Week. I know she's going to be very tired every night, going to various shows and meetings. But I'll be here each night for her to take care of her, to help her relax and get her ready for the next day.
Meegan keeps questioning me, asking me if I'm doing okay. Outside of a short bout of constant diarrhea - probably my body adjusting to the prenatal vijjamin - I feel pretty good.
We got a room at the Marriott Times Square for Fashion Week. I know she's going to be very tired every night, going to various shows and meetings. But I'll be here each night for her to take care of her, to help her relax and get her ready for the next day.
Meegan keeps questioning me, asking me if I'm doing okay. Outside of a short bout of constant diarrhea - probably my body adjusting to the prenatal vijjamin - I feel pretty good.
Rachyl
18 years ago
Monday, September 11th, 2006
It's 4am. Four in the morning. I'm never up this early unless I can absolutely help it. I'm even awake before Meegan's second bout of insomnia. That's bad, I think, but then, how many women consider morning sickness to be a -good- thing?
It's 4am. Four in the morning. I'm never up this early unless I can absolutely help it. I'm even awake before Meegan's second bout of insomnia. That's bad, I think, but then, how many women consider morning sickness to be a -good- thing?
Rachyl
18 years ago
Monday, September 11th, 2006 - Later than before
TWINS! We're having TWINS!
TWINS! We're having TWINS!
==//==//==//==//==//==
Rachyl
18 years ago
(( OOC NOTE! There are some rather inflammatory comments in this next post regarding Catholicism and Rachyl's views on her experiences with it. She and I do not mean this post to be an insult or to have any derogatory effects on those that are practicing Catholics, or any others who may believe in that religion or any close sisters to it. These are her views and should be construed as such. ))
Tuesday, September 12th, 2006
I realized that at one point back in August I'd had a short-hand written post on the back side of the statement that had been prepared for me by Gothic-Ah PR and Meegan's lawyer, but in the hustle and bustle of the press conference I must have left it somewhere or tucked it into my purse which was cleaned and cleared very far in advance for the Fashion Week Trip.
It had gone something like...
~~~~
I have noticed more and more that Meegan isn't going to Church on Sunday. Or if she does, she comes back home looking a bit haggard, a bit sad. Admittedly, I'm not familiar with her having that frame of mind (except around March 24th, which happens to be Veronica's birthday) especially not when she comes home from Church.
So I did some research.
Apparently the Bible has a passage that states it is against God's Will (TM, CR, etc) for a woman to lie with a woman. And the Catholic Church enforces this by promoting excommunication, which means that, basically, Meegan would be kicked out of the Church and be unable to practice as a Catholic ever again, unless she ... hang on let me get this right... "Atones for her sins against God and the Church." Which means she'd have to leave me.
Of course, these are rules based in a religious sect (and yes, I say 'sect' because Catholicism is not all-encompassing, and they sure do seem to have some secular rites) whose mores and ethics are based in a book written by men, interpreted hundreds if not thousands of times over thousands of years through many different languages. Not to mention the fact that this is also an organization that does not seem to have any sort of discipline for their religious leaders who sexually abuse small boys.
Where were the excommunications after my incident? The so-called religious expatriation of the boys or even parents who, at their trial, prayed on crucifixes and rosemaries. Er, rosaries. I don't see any justice in that. A woman who loves and wishes to be secure and safe gets tossed out on her ass, spiritually speaking, but indecent sexual predators tote the Bible and proclaim the name they worship.
Am I bitter? Maybe a little. Meegan's religion has been a part of her for her entire life, and I personally would never have asked her to choose me over it. I am sorry, though, that her love for me is giving her pain and angst in this corner of her life that she honestly doesn't share with me very much. But I wish there were a way for me to help her get through it.
Anyway.
It is now official. Meegan is "out." Part of me wonders what her parents would say, knowing that her only daughter is living in a lesbian relationship. She termed us 'lesbian life-partners' in her PR-bullshit coated speech. Unfortunately, neither the city nor state will allow us to marry (yet) so we have to kowtow to that unwanted label.
I think it's much more... well romantic, but there's a ring of truth, too, to me calling her my wife.
Hmm, ring...
We had a brief conversation, on a whim, while driving home about the last name of the child. Did we want Masters? Or Walker, since I am the one to bear it? I personally liked 'Walker-Masters' but Meegan gave me one of her 'looks' that said, "Do you even know what you're saying?"
She then described to me how much such a surname would get made fun of, but honestly, how else are we going to let them know that both she and I are their parents? It feels more... official.
Just thinking their names in my head - the two boy and two girl names we chose - paired with 'Walker-Masters' makes me smile and gives me a homey-right feeling.
~~~~~~~~~
I think I might have fleshed out what I had wanted to write, but that's okay. And I think the idea that popped into my head there towards the end might be very doable...
Tuesday, September 12th, 2006
I realized that at one point back in August I'd had a short-hand written post on the back side of the statement that had been prepared for me by Gothic-Ah PR and Meegan's lawyer, but in the hustle and bustle of the press conference I must have left it somewhere or tucked it into my purse which was cleaned and cleared very far in advance for the Fashion Week Trip.
It had gone something like...
~~~~
I have noticed more and more that Meegan isn't going to Church on Sunday. Or if she does, she comes back home looking a bit haggard, a bit sad. Admittedly, I'm not familiar with her having that frame of mind (except around March 24th, which happens to be Veronica's birthday) especially not when she comes home from Church.
So I did some research.
Apparently the Bible has a passage that states it is against God's Will (TM, CR, etc) for a woman to lie with a woman. And the Catholic Church enforces this by promoting excommunication, which means that, basically, Meegan would be kicked out of the Church and be unable to practice as a Catholic ever again, unless she ... hang on let me get this right... "Atones for her sins against God and the Church." Which means she'd have to leave me.
Of course, these are rules based in a religious sect (and yes, I say 'sect' because Catholicism is not all-encompassing, and they sure do seem to have some secular rites) whose mores and ethics are based in a book written by men, interpreted hundreds if not thousands of times over thousands of years through many different languages. Not to mention the fact that this is also an organization that does not seem to have any sort of discipline for their religious leaders who sexually abuse small boys.
Where were the excommunications after my incident? The so-called religious expatriation of the boys or even parents who, at their trial, prayed on crucifixes and rosemaries. Er, rosaries. I don't see any justice in that. A woman who loves and wishes to be secure and safe gets tossed out on her ass, spiritually speaking, but indecent sexual predators tote the Bible and proclaim the name they worship.
Am I bitter? Maybe a little. Meegan's religion has been a part of her for her entire life, and I personally would never have asked her to choose me over it. I am sorry, though, that her love for me is giving her pain and angst in this corner of her life that she honestly doesn't share with me very much. But I wish there were a way for me to help her get through it.
Anyway.
It is now official. Meegan is "out." Part of me wonders what her parents would say, knowing that her only daughter is living in a lesbian relationship. She termed us 'lesbian life-partners' in her PR-bullshit coated speech. Unfortunately, neither the city nor state will allow us to marry (yet) so we have to kowtow to that unwanted label.
I think it's much more... well romantic, but there's a ring of truth, too, to me calling her my wife.
Hmm, ring...
We had a brief conversation, on a whim, while driving home about the last name of the child. Did we want Masters? Or Walker, since I am the one to bear it? I personally liked 'Walker-Masters' but Meegan gave me one of her 'looks' that said, "Do you even know what you're saying?"
She then described to me how much such a surname would get made fun of, but honestly, how else are we going to let them know that both she and I are their parents? It feels more... official.
Just thinking their names in my head - the two boy and two girl names we chose - paired with 'Walker-Masters' makes me smile and gives me a homey-right feeling.
~~~~~~~~~
I think I might have fleshed out what I had wanted to write, but that's okay. And I think the idea that popped into my head there towards the end might be very doable...
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, September 27th, 2006
My boobs hurt. I mean really hurt. I can't even put on a bra right now, they're so tender. I feel like I went through a mammogram for a full week for as much as they hurt.
I'm almost constantly hungry. Thankfully we prepared for this eventuality and stocked up on fruits, vegetables, beef jerky without MSG, assorted nuts - I'm really digging the fresh pecans - and granola bars. Meegan didn't quite care for my offer to share my peanut butter granola bar with ketchup, and I'm sure if I read this in a year I'll want to vomit from the very idea, but I was craving ketchup and peanut butter!
It's been rather frustrating for her. A bit over a week ago, we tried to 'nap' but nothing was working for me, and even after giving her a few of her own, I just couldn't seem to climax. It felt like one of those sneezes that is all built up coming from your toes, and then stops at your throat when someone says 'Bless you' prematurely. I know she feels the need to help me feel better - although thankfully she isn't feeling the need to help me with my morning sickness, which is gone - but I really do feel great! Even if I am peeing more than usual, even if my ankles seem to have swollen a little.
This morning while she went about her Fall creation binge I did a bit of exploration, alone in bed. It's probably my imagination, but I could almost swear I see a bit of roundness on my belly that wasn't there before. Most of the sites and books I've consulted say that, being my first pregnancy, I shouldn't be showing, but nonetheless, my eyes are telling my brain there is showage.
Meegan says there's not. But that's okay.
I've been horny. It's rather frsturating for me because - bah, frustrating - because I feel this need to explode, especially with how well Meegan can make me, but it just won't come. Happen. I won't come. I mean. Bah. Shut up Rachyl.
The sun on my bare skin in the mornings feels great. I imagine I feel something like Superman does, absorbing its life-giving rays. It's about the only thing that I can withstand to caress my breasts without causing undue owies.
I'm rather proud of myself, losing as much weight as I had, and in point of fact I've lost a further five pounds since discovering our pregnancy. The doc says it's normal, since I'm growing two bodies, and eventually it'll even out and I'll gain weight as I start to show. I let my fingers explore my abdomen. It's never quite the same as when Meegan does it, not unlike one's inability to tickle oneself, but it feels good. I find myself craving her touch, but I know that she's creating and shouldn't be disturbed.
My mind flashes to a couple nights after we discovered that sex wouldn't be in my immediate future. I'd come home a bit early, doing the office work Meegan needed. I'd just wanted a hot bath and dinner, but what I found was much more interesting... As I turned the corner into our bedroom I saw Meegan, legs spread wide, twisting and writhing, one of her hands grasping and plunging at the flesh-toned toy between her legs, the other hand tugging gently at one of her nipple rings.
I felt my heart speed up, my breath quicken as Meegan brought herself to one climax, then another, but I never felt the usual dampening and heat I would have prior to being pregnant.
I turned away, comforted that she wasn't letting my lack of response be a detriment to her own release, and showered in the standastall next to the kitchen that night...
But lying on my bed, as my fingertips explored the folds between my legs, I had one of those feelings of 'hey that feels nice,' kind of like when you massage your own neck, or the gentle rocking of a porch swing seat... But not the usual heat surge, the blood rush, the dampness, shortness of breath, explosion of self and feeling...
Oh to feel normal...
My boobs hurt. I mean really hurt. I can't even put on a bra right now, they're so tender. I feel like I went through a mammogram for a full week for as much as they hurt.
I'm almost constantly hungry. Thankfully we prepared for this eventuality and stocked up on fruits, vegetables, beef jerky without MSG, assorted nuts - I'm really digging the fresh pecans - and granola bars. Meegan didn't quite care for my offer to share my peanut butter granola bar with ketchup, and I'm sure if I read this in a year I'll want to vomit from the very idea, but I was craving ketchup and peanut butter!
It's been rather frustrating for her. A bit over a week ago, we tried to 'nap' but nothing was working for me, and even after giving her a few of her own, I just couldn't seem to climax. It felt like one of those sneezes that is all built up coming from your toes, and then stops at your throat when someone says 'Bless you' prematurely. I know she feels the need to help me feel better - although thankfully she isn't feeling the need to help me with my morning sickness, which is gone - but I really do feel great! Even if I am peeing more than usual, even if my ankles seem to have swollen a little.
This morning while she went about her Fall creation binge I did a bit of exploration, alone in bed. It's probably my imagination, but I could almost swear I see a bit of roundness on my belly that wasn't there before. Most of the sites and books I've consulted say that, being my first pregnancy, I shouldn't be showing, but nonetheless, my eyes are telling my brain there is showage.
Meegan says there's not. But that's okay.
I've been horny. It's rather frsturating for me because - bah, frustrating - because I feel this need to explode, especially with how well Meegan can make me, but it just won't come. Happen. I won't come. I mean. Bah. Shut up Rachyl.
The sun on my bare skin in the mornings feels great. I imagine I feel something like Superman does, absorbing its life-giving rays. It's about the only thing that I can withstand to caress my breasts without causing undue owies.
I'm rather proud of myself, losing as much weight as I had, and in point of fact I've lost a further five pounds since discovering our pregnancy. The doc says it's normal, since I'm growing two bodies, and eventually it'll even out and I'll gain weight as I start to show. I let my fingers explore my abdomen. It's never quite the same as when Meegan does it, not unlike one's inability to tickle oneself, but it feels good. I find myself craving her touch, but I know that she's creating and shouldn't be disturbed.
My mind flashes to a couple nights after we discovered that sex wouldn't be in my immediate future. I'd come home a bit early, doing the office work Meegan needed. I'd just wanted a hot bath and dinner, but what I found was much more interesting... As I turned the corner into our bedroom I saw Meegan, legs spread wide, twisting and writhing, one of her hands grasping and plunging at the flesh-toned toy between her legs, the other hand tugging gently at one of her nipple rings.
I felt my heart speed up, my breath quicken as Meegan brought herself to one climax, then another, but I never felt the usual dampening and heat I would have prior to being pregnant.
I turned away, comforted that she wasn't letting my lack of response be a detriment to her own release, and showered in the standastall next to the kitchen that night...
But lying on my bed, as my fingertips explored the folds between my legs, I had one of those feelings of 'hey that feels nice,' kind of like when you massage your own neck, or the gentle rocking of a porch swing seat... But not the usual heat surge, the blood rush, the dampness, shortness of breath, explosion of self and feeling...
Oh to feel normal...
Rachyl
18 years ago
Rachyl
18 years ago
Wednesday, October 4th, 2006
Coming up on ten weeks now...
I've been experiencing heart burn. It's a rather unique sensation - not unlike vomitting, actually - but not accompanied by the typical gut-wrenching spasms. It usually happens a little while after meals... And I've taken to eating a lot of small ones. So I now keep a variety of different antacids in my drawer or purse depending on what I'm eating. Would you believe the HB is different depending on what I eat?
It's frustrating enough that I should be beating my head against my desk but the heart burn makes it hurt to bend too much. It started pretty innocuously with some strange hork-sounding hiccups. Just one, that would almost be a belch if recorded and played in reverse, but it rocked my whole body. Then the second time, two in a row. The third time, I felt it... That burning in my chest that my mother occasionally complained about when eating tomato sauce... Like liquid fire or 180 proof whiskey was rolling down my gullet.
Ow.
Tums (the rainbow pack) has been the mainstay of relief. Though I admit, the first time I used one... I used it wrong. 'Take a tums,' Meegan had said. So I did. I cracked open the bottle - we'd bought some for the eventuality - picked up the first blue one and popped into my mouth, downed it with water.
Meegan looked at me funny. 'Did you swallow it?' she said, probably noticing the weird contortions of my neck I was doing to try to get it down. I nodded while I worked my throat muscles. 'You know, I'd almost think -you- were the blonde one right now. You're not supposed to swallow them, Rach.' I think I squeaked in shocked pain as I read the directions. "Place under tongue to dissolve."
It's a good thing we were in the kitchen because I reached for the nearest frying pan to beat myself in the head with... But Meegan intercepted me and instead gently stroked my throat and chest and sternum, alleviating some of the 'ow I just swallowed a pill that's as thick as three stacked quarters' pain.
Then comments were made about my still somewhat-tender breasts and their appealing engorgement, which migrated to some leaning-against-the-kitchen-counter Roman Fingers and eventual offers of cocoa butter massages.
Coming up on ten weeks now...
I've been experiencing heart burn. It's a rather unique sensation - not unlike vomitting, actually - but not accompanied by the typical gut-wrenching spasms. It usually happens a little while after meals... And I've taken to eating a lot of small ones. So I now keep a variety of different antacids in my drawer or purse depending on what I'm eating. Would you believe the HB is different depending on what I eat?
It's frustrating enough that I should be beating my head against my desk but the heart burn makes it hurt to bend too much. It started pretty innocuously with some strange hork-sounding hiccups. Just one, that would almost be a belch if recorded and played in reverse, but it rocked my whole body. Then the second time, two in a row. The third time, I felt it... That burning in my chest that my mother occasionally complained about when eating tomato sauce... Like liquid fire or 180 proof whiskey was rolling down my gullet.
Ow.
Tums (the rainbow pack) has been the mainstay of relief. Though I admit, the first time I used one... I used it wrong. 'Take a tums,' Meegan had said. So I did. I cracked open the bottle - we'd bought some for the eventuality - picked up the first blue one and popped into my mouth, downed it with water.
Meegan looked at me funny. 'Did you swallow it?' she said, probably noticing the weird contortions of my neck I was doing to try to get it down. I nodded while I worked my throat muscles. 'You know, I'd almost think -you- were the blonde one right now. You're not supposed to swallow them, Rach.' I think I squeaked in shocked pain as I read the directions. "Place under tongue to dissolve."
It's a good thing we were in the kitchen because I reached for the nearest frying pan to beat myself in the head with... But Meegan intercepted me and instead gently stroked my throat and chest and sternum, alleviating some of the 'ow I just swallowed a pill that's as thick as three stacked quarters' pain.
Then comments were made about my still somewhat-tender breasts and their appealing engorgement, which migrated to some leaning-against-the-kitchen-counter Roman Fingers and eventual offers of cocoa butter massages.